Enjoy the burrito

I don't have anything nearly as interesting as the spark of yesterday's conversation today. Just some odds and ends to get off my chest.

First, I'm disappointed that my local school levy didn't pass. In most relatively middle to upper-middle class communities, the people who live there got to where they are because they value education. In the past, most of the school levies in this district have passed. I realize times are tough for a lot of people, and that may have had an impact. Unfortunately, this area has seen a lot of rapid growth, and, although, I haven't checked the stats, my guess is that the average price of homes in the area has dropped considerably. More people are moving here that maybe don't have the same philosophy. I could be dead wrong...I don't know. I do know that I moved back to this area not only because it's where I grew up, but it's where I wanted my son to go to school. I moved out of a lower rated district, and into what I thought was a better school district. It may not stay that way, however, and I find that sad.

Related to that, I find it a bit disappointing how much literature I received on the state-wide initiative limiting the power of unions. In fact, I saw local teachers passing out fliers urging people to vote against the initiative, to preserve the rights of union workers....while I think that was an important issue, I think I would have rather have seen them passing out literature concerning the school levy. It seems counter-productive to me to urge voters to protect their rights, including their salaries, while not campaigning just as hard to preserve the jobs and services in their district. Maybe they did...I don't know. I only know what I saw, which was a lot of concern about protecting the unions, and not nearly as much about protecting the school.

Anyway, this news put me in a sour mood. It seemed everywhere I looked today, the news was as bad or worse. I made an effort to avoid it...I can feel myself being pulled into a funk, and don't need one right now. I heard a story that I've heard a version of many times, but it's a trap I still fall into. A guy was talking about how much he liked his lunch, this special burrito. In fact, he liked it so much that he would get a bit sad when he was almost finished, since he wouldn't get another one until the next day. But he was missing the point...he was thinking about it being over, instead of just staying in the moment. Why lessen your enjoyment of the now worrying about the later, or obsessing over the then? "Enjoy the burrito now."

A post-script, something that's been in my head that I need to figure out. I took a look in a mirror earlier, and, for just a split-second, didn't recognize myself. For the briefest time, I saw what others see when they look at me. I think, ultimately, that's the root of my self-esteem issue. It isn't really what I think of me that bothers me...it's what I think YOU think of me, society at large. It shouldn't be that way, really...but I think that's the root of it. It's why I don't like pictures of myself...I'm forced to see me as others do, rather than the image I have of myself. I need to flesh this one out further, but it's been in my head for the last hour or so, and I needed to get it out of there!