Shitty day. There's no question but that I'm an idiot. I can't help but seem to self-destruct.
And the worse thing is, there doesn't seem to be anything I can do about it. I try really, really hard to do what I think is best, but it always seems to end up hurting like hell in the end. I've tried segregating myself, and telling myself that I'm okay...that I'll be okay. I've tried letting down my guard a little bit, and I tell myself THAT will be okay. It's never seems to be okay.
So, I'm not yet good at being by myself, and I'm not good around other people (and I don't seem to be good for them, either.) That doesn't really leave many choices...learn to be, or just not BE. I'm trying to learn...but days like today remind me that I have a long, long way to go. I hope to learn before it's too late.
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