Reading over some of my posts, I'm thinking maybe I picked the wrong title for this blog. It's not really a 'diary'...it's more of a 'what's in my head now' kind of thing. The only person that would be less interested in what's going on in my day-to-day than you would be would me. Maybe a change is in order...we'll see.
I know I discuss a lot about dating and relationships on here. Partly it's because it's something that I think about, and partly it's because I believe it's really the core of human existence. If we didn't have 'relationships' with people, we wouldn't have much of a society. And the most basic of these are partner to partner (I speak mostly from a male-female point of view, but that's just because that's where I'm coming from. We're gender neutral and sex-positive here in the the 'Not-Mad' world...we're all looking for happiness, and if you find it in someone with the same parts as you, so be it. You're happy, you've won. Congrats!)
I read an article today at lunch over at Freakonomics.com (one of my favorite websites) discussing a study done about getting ahead at the workplace. The results of the study basically show that, for men, the bigger an asshole you are, the more you can achieve and the higher you'll rise. People respond to 'dominant' personalities, respecting them even while they hate them. Of course, this reminded me of a common argument I've had with many of the women I've met.
It seems to me that a lot of very beautiful, very put-together women fall for the biggest douchebag they can find. Men that will treat them like shit, disregard their feelings, and walk all over them. I've seen it time and again, and no manner of warnings will seem to stop it. I've even argued about it on FB...that was a mistake. It seems to come off as sour-grapes, but it's truly something that I don't understand. Women like 'dangerous' men that they think they can change.
Many times I've heard the lines "we're too good of friends" or "I don't want to ruin the friendship." Why would you want to date someone who WASN'T your friend?!? I can only remember one case where the girl who I was infatuated with, and finally got the nerve up to ask out, just flat out said "I really like you, but you're just too nice a guy. It won't work." (Thanks for being honest at least!) I was floored. Really? So you only want to date an dickhead? (The guy that she ended up dating knocked her up and split...I guess she got what she wanted.)
Ultimately, I think it's a tired excuse. Listen, I like bad girls. I always have. There's something attractive about someone with a darker side. But I also want someone I can trust, someone I can have fun with...have a darker side, but not one that's going to be harmful to me. Some things, like the creation of the universe, the existence of God, or the beautful girl - douchebag pairing, I may not ever understand.
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