Perspective

perspective -

1. a way of regarding situations, facts, etc., and judging their relative importance

2. the proper or accurate point of view or the ability to see it; objectivity
Collins English Dictionary, Unabridged

I mentioned perspective a couple days ago, something about the need for me to keep the proper perspective. It's something I struggle with constantly. I have a hard time determining what's important and what isn't, and I attach significance to things that don't deserve it.

Because I often put too much value on things, I get frustrated when the truth is the item probably doesn't deserve my attention at all. For example, something will happen at work that will upset me, even though it really doesn't have anything to do with me...I'm getting upset over the principle of the thing, I suppose. That's kind of ridiculous...it's the same thing I was blasting people for yesterday. If it doesn't affect me, why do I care? Those things are items I need to just let go. I'm trying.

I'm also bad at under-valuing important things...for instance, I under-valued my marriage. I should have worked harder at fixing it. Instead, I let things spiral out of control. By the time I stepped out of the tornado, it was too late. It's a mistake I won't make again. There are things I should never let go of...again, I'm trying.

The other problem I have is figuring out the meaning of things...was it important, or did it not matter at all? I struggle with this one all the time. I am HORRIBLE at picking up hints or signals...I tend to undervalue them (I think this is helped by the low self-esteem I have.) Did that touch mean she's interested? Could be, but my mind automatically jumps to 'why in the hell would she be interested in YOU???' So, I miss what could have been a signal, because I can't seem to value them properly.

If there was just a way for me to instantly know what was important, and what isn't, I think I'd be a lot happier. Of course, you could argue that nothing is important...we're all going to die anyway. I'm not THAT much of a pessimist. But the ability to accurately identify what is important, and then focus on them, is definitely a skill I need to work on.